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I accomplish twice as much with half the effort and none of the stress. I like myself better too.

I’ve learned that I’m more productive and a nicer person to be around when I slow down and sit still for a while each day. That’s not something you hear often.

I had a stressful career like everyone else. “Work hard and keep your nose down and you’ll succeed.” That’s what we were taught, and that’s what I did. I jumped from good job to better job, worked like a demon, schmoozed with the bigwigs, and climbed the corporate ladder with steel-toed boots.

It was stressful, to say the least. Always on the hunt for more money and prestige. Always driving myself and my teams to “work smarter, faster, harder!” The better everyone around me did, the better I did.

The intensity and pressure were killing me.

Learning to sit still

Ten years ago, I saw some articles on the benefits of mindful meditation. They told me all the successful leaders in Silicon Valley were hiring Buddhist masters to lead them to new heights of productivity. It was all the rage. 

I couldn’t afford to hire a personal monk but I could download a cheap meditation app to my phone. It said it would help me get more work done, and along the way, I’d feel healthier and happier.

How hard could it be? Sit still and think about nothing. Easy.

The first time I tried it, I set a timer and sat on the couch. Einstein was wrong: Time slows to a painful crawl when you’re stationary.

I thought about nothing for a few moments and then remembered something I needed to do on an urgent project. Crap, I had to grab a pen and write it down before I got back to my nothingness. The furnace kicked in and reminded me that I needed to change the filter. Nothingness again. Dogs, cats, kids, even sunshine — all conspired against me.

Doing nothing can’t possibly result in doing more, I thought. It literally contradicts itself. So, I turned off the timer and went to work. The rumbling pit in my stomach returned with the familiarity of an old friend.

It changed my life

In time I got better at it. I read some books and downloaded a better app and practiced almost every day. It took me a month or two to quiet the noise, but when I finally did it felt nice.

People noticed. I noticed. I was less confrontational and more accepting. Frustration and anger flared less often and dissipated quickly when they did.

I learned what might be the most important lesson ever: How to listen with the intensity of the sun

When I direct my undivided attention to you and listen intently to what you have to say, I understand you and your concerns like I never could have before. My biases are attenuated, my questions are on point, and the tangled kernel of the issue pops up like a prairie dog.

When you seek to understand without personal bias and urgency, you’ll solve problems smarter, faster, and better.

They were right. Physics and logic be damned, taking a slower approach does speed up a solution.

But there’s so much more

Meditation is just the tip of the iceberg. In fact, you don’t have to meditate, the simple act of sitting still while being by yourself delivers unimaginable benefits. 

Stress Reduction 

Stress affects us all. I remember my breaking point when the atmosphere at work had devolved into a spiraling circle of blame and the weight of the world was crushing me. I was so overwhelmed with stress that I went up to the top floor of the central atrium in our headquarters and stood there, wondering what it would be like to step over the railing. 

That was many years ago and sitting quietly by myself taught me how to reduce stress, relax, and take life a little less seriously.

Who doesn’t like calm?

Now pressure and stress simply slough off my shoulders and blow away in the breeze. I’m happier and healthier. Muscle tension that gave me cramps is gone. I’m more social, productive, effective, and … calm. 

Focus

Brains are trained to fire at the speed of light. We jump from one thought to the next in a nanosecond. That’s the reason you walk into a room and forget why you’re there — your brain has already moved on while you’re still trying to catch up.

There is no such thing as multitasking. At best, it’s just rapid sequential single-tasking which is highly inefficient. To do your best work, you need to focus — on one thing at a time.

I learned to focus my attention when I sat quietly in a dark room. It took months, but as I sat and focused on my breathing or the furnace or a bus driving by, I got good enough to take that skill to work with me and use it with my staff and colleagues. My productivity rose, solutions came faster, and people felt more appreciated and involved.

Creativity 

If you’re a creative writer, artist, or maker, sitting quietly alone will pump up your creativity. When you let your mind wander and daydream for a few minutes you’ll be better able to access old memories, emotions, and random bits of stored knowledge — the seedlings of spectacular art.

Letting your mind wander leads to greater creativity

Periodically stop what you’re doing, sit still, and let your mind go where it will. When I’m stumped or blocked, I’ll walk down to a nearby lake and sit in solitude on the shore enjoying the sights and smells while my mind wanders off to the moon. It always comes back with a big payload of useful ideas.

Tolerance

It’s an unfortunate fact that work sometimes requires interacting with disagreeable people.

When I started my habit of sitting quietly and meditating, one of the unexpected side benefits was gaining a tolerance for nasty folks. I learned to think of them as speedbumps or squeaky wheels that aren’t very helpful but nevertheless part of my journey. 

Do you know what else I’m more tolerant of now? Aches and pains, waiting in line, idiotic rules, and all sorts of those little foibles life throws at us. Few things in life will bother you when you have patience and tolerance.

Self-appreciation

Being alone with your thoughts teaches you to appreciate yourself and enjoy your own company. I have plenty of friends, a wife, and kids, but I’m perfectly happy dining alone or going to a show by myself. I have the freedom to selfishly enjoy a quirky lecture on honey bees or a nature hike to an abandoned dump without the requirement of being accompanied by an entourage.

When you enjoy being alone, you’re always with a good friend

When you focus on yourself and your own needs, it separates you from social obligations that can be difficult and stress-inducing. You can engage with others on your own terms or just sit still and do nothing. It’s delightful to be alone when you like yourself. 

Energy

Did you know that solitude and boredom can be beneficial? Even the strongest brain has its limits, and giving it an opportunity to rest with nothing expected of it is like refueling a rocket. It gives you a strategic pause to collect your thoughts, look inward, and learn valuable insights about yourself, your life, and your work. 

At the office, most of my day involved chipping away at backlogs of projects while tending to others’ incessant needs. I craved those rare moments when I was between tasks and sitting bored at my desk. Pushing past the urge to fill time with useless activities frees the mind to wander into uncharted territory and explore new and unusual ideas that are captivating and energizing.

Health

Your head and heart will thank you. Sitting quietly cures headaches and improves blood pressure. You’ll sleep better and have a more positive outlook on life. 

I still exercise regularly, hiking, cycling, walking, and the like. But I always feel energized and eager to conquer the world when I stand up after my quiet time. 

They say that sitting calmly relaxes muscles and shrinks the wrinkles that make you look older. I don’t know — it may work for you but I still look old and wrinkly. I wonder how bad I’d look if I hadn’t been practicing?

How to start

Sitting still is probably the easiest activity you can ever attempt. 

Pick a time that works for you. Early mornings when I get up are my favorite. Start with a comfortable chair in a quiet room. Close the door, close your eyes, and sit still. Focus on your breathing and nothing more. Thoughts will come and go, and that’s to be expected, but always return focus to your breath. 

Give it a try for one month, minimum. Five minutes at a time is fine for starters. Work your way up to ten or twenty, and in time you’ll eagerly anticipate the relaxing tranquility of sitting still. You’ll also learn to summon the feeling of calmness when you’re walking, driving, talking, angry, emotional, and joyful. 

There’s no hidden agenda or goal. Just sit and relax. It’s that simple.

That’s it. There’s no objective or higher purpose other than to enjoy time alone untethered from the noise of the world ricocheting around in your head. 

A lifelong tradition

I retired last year but I still find tremendous value in sitting still even without the same level of work stress I had before. Enhanced focus, insight, empathy, and creativity make me a happier and healthier person.

It’s truly transformative. 

I like myself a lot better now.